It's been a long time...

It's been a long time, but alas I have been kept quite busy with schoolwork. We are all born to spend our entire youths in school, and possibly some time after, and for what? To be educated? To be a successful part of this society. Does it even mean anything? Maybe it's so I can get a desk job and work there for my whole life to convince myself I'm happy. Is anyone really happy? Or are we just living day by day attempting to convince ourselves of this happiness.

Well I am chugging along on this thing we call life. But is there any other way? I do not know of any, but if there are any suggestions I would love to hear it.

On the Edge of A Cliff

If you're on the edge of a cliff, what do you do? Do you turn back and try to find another way around or do you attempt to climb down? Do you jump down and just hope things will be okay? Should I be safe and take the long way, or take a risk?

I'm not sure. I need to consult Didi My Doe.

Overwhelmed

I'm starting to feel really overwhelmed. I have so much to complete in so little time. On top of all this is the editing job; I feel way too much pressure. I'm a volcano, hot and bothered and hopefully in an exotic place like Hawaii and Pompeii. I'm so sad that my much needed break is almost gone. I guess I'm going back to the real world.  Things could be worse.

To quote the song I am currently obsessed with, "hope is on a rope, hope's on a frayed rope... I'm scared and unprepared".

Working Over Spring Break

I need to start working on my feature article, but I don't have a topic. I hate when teachers assign things over a much needed break, almost to spite their students. My career writing classes have one such teacher. As the semester continues, I despise her more and more even though I like her class content for the most part. She ruins it though. These could be the best classes ever if she wasn't teaching them. I am going to give her the worst review ever and she if got fired, I would feel no sympathy.

On the other hand, I landed a real freelance editing job through my mom (she's a teacher and has a parent working on a novel) that pays! I'm excited to have a resume buffer and some income, but it couldn't have come at a more inconvenient time. I have sooooo much work but, oh well, it must be done.

I can't wait until this semester is over. It will be a huge relief to not have to deal with all this anymore. By the way, this is the android avatar for Elli Moore. What do you think?

The Countdown is at an End

Finally, after so many weeks of dreaming, hoping, spring break is finally here. I depart tomorrow, to Southern California for warmer weather, like flying south for the winter. It's been rainy and desolate in San Jose and I can't wait for it to stop. My bag's all packed and since it's late, just this for now, but more coming since I'll have a lot more time.

YAY!

Almost to the Finish Line

The worst is over. I have completed two midterms, an essay response, and final draft of a review essay. I've slaved away all weekend, and I know it will be worth it, but I'm having a hard time seeing that now. I still have another midterm to study for and two more days of reading before spring break. All  I want to do is sleep and drop off the grid for a couple of days, only to resurface for my much anticipated break. But, responsibility kicks in and I will have to suck it up and tough it out. I made a little droid avatar during one of my short study breaks. Does it look like me? Let me know.

Nostalgia and The Reality of Growing Up

I've been thinking about my past lately. About high school, the many concerts I used to attend, hanging out. I'm much too busy completing various assignments to have a social life. The only chance I get is when my boyfriend, Matt comes up to visit me. Even then, oftentimes I'm still stuck studying and he's here to keep me company. The last concert I attended was for my favorite band, The Matches, for their farewell show. I was and still am devastated. I would give just about anything to go to a Matches concert again. It's still not clear why they dissolved. As a result of my recent nostalgia, I've gone online and bought a couple of Matches shirts that are still left, and a two posters from Ebay. Matt would definitely make fun of me for this, but he doesn't understand that The Matches are a symbol of my youth, when going to Matches shows were of utmost priority.  I know I am still young now, and many may think me ridiculous for saying this, but I feel so old. Back then, I was so carefree, with a raging social life, when my friends and concerts were the most important things. Those days are gone now. I am 23, still in school, and when I am finished it will only get worse as more and more responsibilities are piled on as I realize more and more that this is the reality of growing up.

On another note, Matt is arriving tomorrow and I'm super excited, even though I have a TON of homework to do this weekend. My roommate is hardly here, so it will be nice not to be alone.

Spring Break is Approaching

Spring break is approaching a little too slowly for my liking. I’m slaving away over books exam prep, yearning for the relief of my upcoming holiday. My professor is at a conference and instead of giving us a day off, she prepared online YouTube lectures. Joy. It is reintroducing me to T.S. Eliot and The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock, making me nostalgic for high school and the book of T.S. Eliot poems I stole out of the Creative Writing library upon my graduation. There were about five copies, and I wanted to remain apart of that life even after I left it. I went to an arts high school called the Orange County High School of the Arts, majoring in Creative Writing. This was, t this day, the best decision I ever made. It was definitely a different type of education with block scheduling; the academic day ended at 2:00 and conservatory (art classes) began at 2:30. I took classes like Origins and Sources of Fiction along with a slew of more normal classes like novel writing, poetry, screenplays, songwriting, and poetry. Sigh. So now, instead of having a free night, I am here, on Saint Patrick’s Day, in my dorm, alone, working on my homework.

On another note, I’ve been feeling incredibly nostalgic, which may have prompted my trip down (excuse the cliché) memory lane. I’ve been rummaging through old photographs and such, maybe trying to hold onto them as the time keeps slipping away.

A Student Like Any Other

I am a student, a college student. I go to class four days a week and live on campus in a tiny room. I've been in school for almost six years, chugging along slowly but surely, chipping away at the unit requirement with willful determination. I attended Orange Coast College for three years and I am on my third at San Jose State. I was once a rebellious Interior Design major, grumbling while hunched over large pieces of vellum, a paper used for hand drafting, twisting my pencil across the surface. I quickly learned that I made the wrong choice and quickly became an eager English major, ready to trade in arduous drafting projects for reading and essays.

So here I am, average college student, reading at least 60 pages a night, English student extraordinaire, making my way towards graduation. They say the journey is the best part, so here's to the journey.